You Can't Offend a Dead Man

How can we who died to sin live in it any longer? Romans 6:2

The buzz on talk radio this morning is an ill-advised comment made by President Obama's chief of staff when he referred to something as "(expletive deleted) retarded." Sarah Palin, mother of a child with Down's Syndrome has called for his head for the insensitive comment. Supporters are coming to his defense, saying that he meant no offense and that expecting someone to take the word out of their vocabulary is unreasonable.

The truth lies somewhere in the middle. Was the chief of staff intending to offend the parents of special needs children when he made the comment? Probably not. Was he using the dictionary definition of the word to describe a situation? Prefacing it with the strong expletive indicates that he probably was not. His ill-advised comment likely indicates a blast from his past when such comments were used to refer to special needs individuals without consideration for their feelings. Chances are he does not know anyone with special needs (his loss) and the uproar over the comment has taken him by surprise.

While there is no excuse for someone in his position to make such an insensitive remark, the political realm is quickly getting to the point where anything you say is like manuvering through a field of land mines. For example, the candidate for governor in South Carolina made a comment about government assistance being like "feeding stray animals." His point is that the more government assistance you give, the more it will be requested. And, it is true, that government gets the behavior it subsidizes. People immediately tried to spin the comment to mean that he wanted to euthanize people in order to lower government costs. Not his position at all.

One of my triggers is when someone makes the comment that a situation is like "having a gun pointed at your head." People who say it in my presence generally do not know that my mother was murdered, shot in the head. But, the concept they are attempting to convey is lost on me as my personal experiences color the reaction I have to the phrase.

Over the years, I have learned that I am not going to stop everybody from saying the phrases that set me off. However, my response to them is my choice.

Several years ago my mentor advised me to repent (again) because I was carrying an offense over something. His point was that you cannot offend a dead man. If we have died to sin, insults and attacks should not offend us. I, of course, debated the issue for a while since I was feeling particularly offended and felt entitled to my feelings.

Let me save you some time. You can't logic yourself out of it. If you have died, you can't be offended. If you are feeling offended, you probably have something else that needs to die.